One of the things I’m always talking about is how easily confused I am since my stroke. It takes me a while to notice things, to catch on and up. One small change in detail and I’m totally and completely lost. It makes me feel stupid to a point where I am fighting off breakdowns sometimes. One of the important things to learn while learning to live with a disability is that not everyone thinks of you or your specific type of disability when they design things like jars, paper towel dispensers and pretty much anything that requires two hands to not only work but work efficiently. I don’t understand why wheelchair ramps are so steep or why doors to public places are so heavy or have awkward handles; or, why handicap railings are only on one side or why handicap restrooms have toilets that are always too high or way too low.
I worked in retail and we had guidelines for our aisles specifically made for people in wheelchairs. That’s it, just wheelchairs. Nothing for people with one arm or use a cane. Nothing for people in the dressing rooms that need more room than a 4’9″ petite woman would need unless you go into the one super large room designated for the wheelchair bound which is usually occupied by a thief, gaggle of teens or that poor mother trying to buy a nice blouse for dinner with her husband and has to bring all 3 of her kids with her. I have trouble trying on shirts in dressing rooms because they don’t allow for the room I need with my stiff arm and leg so I wing it and just try it on at home. So, I understand that not everything is made for the disabled. The space we take up as a whole is significant but individually, broken down by types of disability and those that actually need special spaces and accommodations, it’s probably a seemingly insignificant portion of the population to make it worth the trouble and cost to consider these people.
I do my best to understand this when I find myself caught in the narrow space between the restroom stall door and the toilet because I’m unable to maneuver my body in the same manner as a “normal” person. I try to think of this when I’m asking my husband to open a bag or jar for me because I just can’t do it this time even though I tried for ten whole minutes before asking for help. I try to think of this when I am at the grocery store and all I see is a wall of product I don’t recognize because they changed the label on the one product on that shelf that I do use. I try to think of this when I go to a new website and I am overwhelmed by all of the colors, the distracting designs and the many menus that lead you to more menus and pages of even more menus. But sometimes, like when I check my Google Plus linked to this blog for the first time since December (maybe it’s been longer?) and discover that my posts are all private and not public I just get angry. I searched through the settings, I checked the help area and all that and was still confused about why this is not working for me. I checked here but there is no option (that I could find) that allows you to change who can see your posts. How do I make sure these posts will be shared publicly on my Google Plus????!!! Well, apparently you have to delete your posts and reshare them with a different audience. I mean, that’s just dumb. I’m sorry. I don’t think you have to be brain-damaged to find that idiotic. My posts will stay private I guess. I don’t know how to make sure this post is shared publicly because it doesn’t say. I’m so confused and angry. I don’t even check Google Plus because it’s so confusing and this confirms just how confusing it really is to me.
I don’t expect everyone to consider brain injured persons when designing and changing things around but it would be nice if people didn’t expect all persons to be absolutely literate in everything or not the least bit technologically challenged. It’s too difficult. I’m only 31, I should still be “in the loop” but I’m becoming an angry, bitter, “out of the loop” old woman…and it sucks.
So I’m going to post this and see if it comes out public on Google Plus. If not…I have no idea what the hell I’m supposed to do…